So I didn't make squad leader in my EMT class. They made their decisions off of the first three classes, and the only thing they said was they were looking for high scores and leadership quality. I don't know why I didn't qualify. This isn't the first time something like this has happened. Sometimes I feel as though I get overlooked, like people don't see my qualities at first, but then discover that I had those qualities all along. I think I must perpetuate it somehow, but I since I don't know how, I can't fix it. I'm one of the top people in my EMT class. I read all the chapters for the week on the weekend before and practice constantly. I like helping out others who have a harder time getting the material. I want out squad to get together, bond, and practice. But it's not up to me. I try to urge things as a team member (anyone want to meet for coffee after?), but so far no one's been up for it.
I remember the time I was in 42nd Street and for some reason they cast me as swing dancer (like the understudy for the whole chorus). After a few rehearsals, they realized I really knew how to tap dance (seven years of private lessons helped), and they ended up putting me in a few of the musical numbers in addition to acting as swing.
I feel like I get underestimated a lot, and it's frustrating. Of course, it would be really handy if I was a spy or something, but I'm not. I'm a goal-oriented woman who puts a lot of work into what she does and is proud of it. And wants to help others, too. Sigh. Since this has been going on my whole life, I don't think it will change. But if anyone knows what's going on, I'd love you to enlighten me!
Anyway, EMT class is getting harder, now, that we no longer follow our sheets but start to incorporate a variety of illnesses, traumas, and scenarios. More thinking on the feet. But it's so much FUN!
At this point, I'll keep having fun, learning, helping out, and hoping our squad finds that team spirit soon.
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